Week 12 - Madcapping and guaranteed non punditry!

Boy am I glad my lack-a-sac senses prevented me from putting money on TEN last night. Yet another bullet I dodged in Week 11. Let's see if I can continue my matrix-like evasions for Week 12....

GB at DET: I forsee picking GB in this game, since they are killing the spread this year, and for some reason, DET is always overrated. I like GB to destroy DET in this game, and I'm thinking Vegas only gives them a slight edge. GB -11.

NYJ at DAL: I was really snobby about the Jets last week, and the went in and upset PIT. Seems to be a theme for me this year. In theory this game should be everything last week wasn't. Dallas is rolling and I don't see how the Jets can compete. No pass rush = TDs for TO. DAL -11.

IND at ATL: How is it that Indy has all these cheesepuff teams when they are injured? Indy clearly is the favorite here, but this game is actually on thursday, giving them only a few days rest, plus all the injuries..... IND -8.

TEN at CIN: Vince Young has thrown for more than 250 yds two weeks in a row - and they've lost both games. Albert Haynesworth's injury seems to be having a serious effect on TN's Defense also. Last night I expected TN to run all over the Broncos, and didn't. I would make the same prediction this week - run run run - but will they? They wouldn't go pass-whacky two weeks in a row against terrible run-defense teams woud they? TEN -5.

BUF at JAX: This game could end up being really interesting. Buffalo is scrappy as hell, fighting for their playoff lives while JAX is one of those teams that keeps winning, but unspectacularly. Although after last week I have a feeling Losman might be wetting his jockstrap for the rest of the year. JAX -4.

OAK at KC: KC is another scrappy-ass team. OAK seems to have lost its will (or possibly never had the ability?), and KC is still in the AFC West hunt. Plus the game is in Arrowhead. KC -3.

HOU at CLE: Surprisingly enough, these are two of my favorite teams to watch right now. Weird, huh? Anyway, beware the Texans! This year's stats and past performance you can throw out the window now that Shaub and Johnson are back (exhibit A - last week vs NO). CLE is playing so well, though, plus they have that 'team of destiny' feeling like GB does in the NFC. I think I'll stay clear of this game, it could go either way, but for madcapping purposes I'll take the Dog Pound CLE -2.

SEA at STL: This is one of those games you want to bet your house on, until you see SEA turn the ball over 6 times and fall down trying to tie their shoelaces. Then you have to find a cardboard box big enough to keep the rain off you at night... This game should be a SEA win, but I don't trust SEA to be good, and STL to stink. What are the beta values on this team, btw? SEA -5.


MIN at NYG: MIN pisses me off. They suck just enough to not cover spreads when they are favored, and show up in games when they should get creamed. I'm just bitter because they beat OAK by 7 last week and busted my parlay. NYG -8.

NO at CAR: Can Carolina beat anyone? I mean, do they atleast have MIA or STL on their schedule? NO is officially on the shelf with DET and PHI in the Multiple Personality closet, but they should win this one. NO -7.

WAS at TB: Tough game. TB plays tough every week, Garcia keeps 'em in all the games, I like Ernest Graham... all the same stuff I say every week. WAS seems to be the best at just barely losing. TB -1.

SF at ARI: *sigh* I'm gonna get creamed for this, but what can you do? ARI -9.

DEN at CHI: Cutler looked like Elway last night. Maybe he's turned the corner? Atleast maybe his better than Rex. DEN -4.

BAL at SD: I accidentally hit 'alt' instead of 'shift' when i first typed, and got these crazy wingding characters. I like this one so much - Å - I will henceforth use it whenever I talk about BÅL. Oh, right. Football. BÅL is a bunch of whiny bitches on defense, and still don't have a quarterback. SD... hey! did you see Shawne "My pecs are real, i swear" Merriman get pasted by little MJD last week? One of the coolest things I've ever seen. MJD popped him in the chest head-on and Mr. Real-Pecs dropped like a sack of Balco Powder. Frickin Awesome. SD -3.

PHI at NE: Does anyone ever bet against the Patriots? Why doesn't Vegas put up some stupid spread like -39 and see what happens. NE -39.

MIA at PIT: Remember last week when I said "um...yeah PIT -12". Screw you PIT! Now I'm in the exact same position as last week and my choices are to ignore last week and risk looking like the idiot who didn't pay attention or adjusting and looking like the idiot who thought MIA could hang in this game. PIT -10.

TMC